Sorry for the lack of content the last two days… I do have a post written but I just have to share this… experience with you.   I figure I write posts with either serious information or serious stories and I want to give you all a chance to laugh at my expense.

As I mentioned the other day we have had weeks and weeks and weeks of rain/storms/clouds.  It has been crazy ridiculous.  With all the rain we’ve received, even on the mornings where we aren’t getting rain, it’s been too muddy to really get the dogs out.  I’m not a clean freak by any stretch of the imagination but I simply don’t have the time in the day to give 3 or 4 dogs baths after each time they run outside, nor do I have the time to mop after each time my muddy dogs walk through the house.  With that being said, the dogs are simply not getting the physical exercise that they need–nosework, puzzle games, indoor recall games, and short 10-15 minute chuck-it sessions can only satisfy my monsters for so long.
Finally we had a nice day yesterday (the only sunny day in the 10-day forecast) so I took the dogs to the farm to let them blow off some steam.  Shayne and Rio were flying around the farm like crazy… as if they’ve been crated for weeks.  I lost sight of Rio at some point when Dexter was checking out a wood pile; this in and of itself is not a bad thing or an uncommon thing.  What was significantly less … acceptable was how long it took him to recall.  He is typically back in a flash even over a great distance, so when he was not back in a flash I figured he found something particularly yummy …but I had NO idea just how ‘yummy’.
As he rounded the hill and came into view I noticed my white and black dog looked strangely… brown/grey.
He was about 10 feet in front of me when I smelled him.  It was, perhaps, the most putrid smell I’ve ever smelled–it was not the smell of coyote poop, more along the lines of cow or horse but way more potent with a more icky smell to it.  As soon as he got close I could see he was literally 60% grey/brown from rolling in poop.  I shooed him away when he got within arm’s reach.  I saw him go back to where he was rolling (presumably) and I called him back… and regretted that choice… if he even ventured within 10 ft of me or I was down-wind from him I could easily catch drift of his stank.

There are many things I tolerate.. coyote poop smeared on his body, rolling in dead things, rolling in mud puddles.. but THIS was beyond my capabilities… it was so bad I couldn’t even take a picture until well after it happened and he had rubbed some of it off.  I nearly thought about leaving him there because I couldn’t stomach the thought of him being in the car–Eww!  I rinsed him off with nearly 2 gallons of water and he still stunk it up ….but I relented and allowed him in the car.
I am not being dramatic when I say that I nearly lost my lunch with him in the car.  I got him home and refused to let him in the house, even after a thorough hosing, he still stunk.  I called my neighbor, a groomer, and she had time that afternoon for me to use her facilities and professional-grade shampoo/conditioner.  After a normal shampoo, a de-skunk shampoo and a conditioning treatment he was sad….BUT he did smell a little better (though if you put your nose to his neck, he definitely still smells).
So what did I learn today?  Being nice and taking the dogs to a nice place to burn off steam will only end badly for me.  LOL!  Not that it will stop me, but I may keep shampoo in my car to temporarily de-stink him when he rolls in something.